V1 (07/06/2025)
(est. total read time for service training 1:45)DGL Bros is currently in the process of transitioning to a more sustainable service model where all members are required to be of service, with the hopes of eventually becoming a self-sustaining, direct democratic governance group. As such we are introducing this first round of trainings to provide more in-depth guidance on how to fulfill each of the Rank 1 service positions.
Rank 1 service positions are essential and designed to be flexible for differing availabilities of time and energy.
Rank 1 DGL brothers are required to do a monthly service reflection/check-in on the “DGL Service” channel as part of their accountability. This check-in can be as brief or as long as desired and is intended to help the brother on their spiritual path. The check in should include quantitative (numerical) figures of service work done where applicable, though exact figures are not necessary. And the reflection should include insights gained from service, emotions, thoughts, or feelings — anything goes. Examples with varying lengths could be:
[Short, Headhunter] Bob M, July 2025 Service Check in: received DGL training. Posted headhunter message on meetings each day I attended, maybe 3 or 4 days per week. Maybe 3 guys reached out to me and I sent them the charter but none responded back. Through this service work, I’m learning about letting go of unavailable people and not chasing after those who aren’t interested. Feels kind of freeing actually!
[Longer, Chaplain] Mark L, August 2025 Service Check in: I received my DGL training which was very interesting. I felt some resistance towards some of the points, and I felt resentment towards one of the admins (vague mention!) who I felt was being overly demanding. A part of me wanted to leave DGL and never come back, but a voice inside me told me to just stick around, so I am. Throughout the month I ended up calling 5 or 6 different DGL bros, maybe one per week. It was actually surprisingly powerful. I thought that this kind of “formalized” way of approaching outreach was silly, but in a way it was kind of nice to “wear the suit” of DGL service and contact people I’d otherwise not talk to. Although I am unsure if these will lead to fellowship friendships, it was refreshing to do this service and not as burdensome as a I believed when I first started. I’m learning, I guess, that some things look a lot more daunting from the outside than when I just start them and get going. I notice I do this in many areas of my life — avoiding starting — and this service work, surprisingly is helping me see that and be aware of it.
Note: For ease of commissar(s)/admin(s), please kindly begin your monthly check ins in the following format
“[Name], [Month] [Year] Service Check in”
e.g.
“John T, March 2026 Service Check in:”
This helps streamline the admin team’s efforts to keep track of user activity.
Chaplains and headhunters form the core of DGL bros service! Chaplains’ jobs are in short, to “proactively [reach] out to and encourages members, especially newcomers and less active members.” As was once said in a recovery room:
“We already know enough! We don’t need to know more. We need to be reminded more.”
Chaplains’ jobs are to remind DGL bros that they are important, matter, and that they are a valuable part of our community. Chaplain is considered a light/medium level of commitment as it is completely flexible and takes only 5-10 minutes to do each week.
Making at least 1 service-oriented outreach call per week to DGL bros, giving particular emphasis to newcomers and less active members. Making space and listening during phone calls. Being respectful of others’ spiritual journey(s) and having healthy boundaries around feedback. Offering experience, strength, hope, and empathy and encouragement when appropriate.
Writing a monthly service reflection check-in in “DGL Service”
On Feedback and Listening — Healthy boundaries around feedback are of paramount importance! As is ideal etiquette, it is important to ask for a fellow’s consent before offering feedback or support, but non-feedback empathy and resonation is always welcome.
Example call:
Chaplain: “Hello brother ABC, how are you?”
ABC: “I’m not doing so well, I have been kind of down lately and behind on my DGLs.”
Chaplain: “ I understand. It sounds like you are having a tough time. Would you like to share what’s going on?”
ABC: “Sure. I am going through a tough time with XYZ, and I feel really s****y.”
✅ Appropriate Response:
Chaplain: “I’m sorry to hear about that man, it sounds really tough. Would you be open to receive feedback and encouragement on that?”
ABC: “I could use some encouragement, but I’m not looking for feedback or criticism… I can’t take it right now.”
Chaplain: “Of course. I just wanted to let you know I also went through XYZ myself and it was really challenging. There were a lot of phases with that and progress wasn’t so clear. I wanted to offer you encouragement that you’re doing better than you think you are, and this won’t last forever.”
ABC: “Thanks man. I know you care. I feel the same but I guess hearing those words makes me feel 1% better. I appreciate it.”
❌ Inappropriate Response:
Chaplain: “Yeah man. XYZ? That’s tough bro. Have you ever tried meditating on it? Or doing 50 jumping jacks? That s*** helps me tremendously.”
ABC: “I’m not interested in that… and I hate jumping jacks.”
Chaplain: “Bro you really gotta try it though. I’m telling you it works.”
ABC: “I don’t want your feedback right now. Ugh.”
Chaplain: “DO JUMPING JACKS!”
ABC: “F*** you. I hate DGL Bros! Bunch of crazy maniacs!”
(hangs up the phone, leaves group)
Do you see how inappropriate unsolicited feedback giving can actually repel people away from their recovery? Though trying to “help” or “fix” others has good intentions, the reality is that we are addicts with trauma, and recovery comes at HP’s pace, not ours. We must admit that we don’t know all the answers and respect each person’s sacred journey.
🕊️ DGL chaplains may be asked to do a three-way call for their first chaplain call with an admin’s supervision and support to help guide them and mentor them on any difficulties they may have.
Reflection Question — When was a time when you were not ready to hear something, someone gave you unsolicited feedback, and it felt hurtful?
Headhunters recruit new DGL bros and take them through the intake call process, explaining rules and history.
Posting the DGL Bros recruitment blurb & phone number once only per meeting at appropriate SLAA meetings allowing chat
Vetting & initiating DGL prospects through the intake interview/call
Writing a monthly service reflection check-in in “DGL Service”
At DGL Bros, we believe strongly in the 12-step principle of “attraction rather than promotion.” We never try to convince, chase, or persuade anyone to join DGL bros. We simply share that such a community and practice exists, and allow those interested to be “attracted” to us, and reach out. We do not engage in “push marketing,” and as such there are no quotas of recruits for headhunters. All that is asked of headhunters is to post the recruitment blurb along with their phone number in appropriate SLAA groups, respecting the rules of whatever group they are attending, so as not to attract any negative attention to the group.
[Name — (optional) Location ] [Phone Number]
DGL Bros - Men's gratitude & accountability WhatsApp community - txt for info
e.g.
David G — Miami (888) 674-2342
DGL Bros - Men's gratitude & accountability WhatsApp community - txt for info
Notice how the recruitment blurb is not promotional, persuasive, or overbearing. It’s simple, to-the-point, and doesn’t take up too much space or words. Headhunters may adopt this blurb with their name and number to post in groups.
A reminder that we post the blurb and phone number only once per meeting! We do not want to be labelled as spam, or go into “push” tactics as this betrays our spiritual principles. Depending on volume of headhunters to avoid double posting, headhunters may be given “assigned recruitment times/meetings” where they are asked to post, and otherwise asked to refrain from posting about DGL Bros. Assignments are subject to change and can be discussed with admins.
In our shared experience we learned that DGL Bros is not a good fit for everyone, and we encourage members to freely explore this community as a tool in their recovery, without pressure. DGL Bros does not claim to be “the right” method to “do recovery” — it’s just one approach that has worked very well for many of us.
As such, harkening the theme of “attraction rather than promotion”, DGL headhunters vet prospects through the following phases to eliminate prospects that are either not serious, or not a good fit for the group. DGL Bros is designed as supplemental recovery work for fellows who are already consistently going to meetings; a reminder that “DGL Bros is not meant to replace working a 12-step program.” And so, the phases of vetting are as follows:
Initial Contact — A prospect reaches out via the headhunter’s phone number stating they are interested in the group.
Sending the charter — The headhunter responds thanking them for their interest, sends them the most current version of the DGL Bros Charter as an attachment on WhatsApp, and asks them to:
“please read the group charter at dglbros.com/charter and let me know if you believe this would be a good fit for you.”
Setting up the intake call — If the fellow does not respond, the headhunter does not pursue the prospect. If the fellow does respond stating he has read the charter and is interested, the headhunter schedules a time to do the intake call, which typically takes up to 30 min.
The Intake Call — The headhunter begins by asking the fellow to qualify for a 2 min share on what brought them into the program and how long they have been in recovery, qualifying them as members of SLAA. After this the headhunter very briefly may share a bit about themselves and then move to the charter reading portion. In the charter reading portion, the prospect reads aloud the group charter to the headhunter, and the headhunter offers any explanation or clarification as needed.
The Vow — Once the prospect has completed reading aloud the group charter, the headhunter asks the prospect the following question :
“having completed the intake requirements, do you, ____________ (name) choose to formally enter DGL Bros?”
If they answer yes, they make the following vow in a way that is appropriate to them with their spiritual beliefs, substituting “Higher Power” if they are unsure, or do not have a spiritual belief:
“I, ________________ (name), solemnly vow ____________ (upon my Higher Power) to keep confidential and secret all information and data shared on DGL to non-participants, unless explicitly given permission by the sharing individual.”
The Welcoming — At long last, the intake call is over! The headhunter congratulates the new initiate on making it this far and emphasizes that not many do, welcoming him to DGL Bros! The headhunter adds or requests add via Admin for the new member to DGL Classic and asks if the new initiate would also like to be added to Freestyle or other channels, reminding them that for all other channels besides Classic, DGL members are free to join and leave as they please without admin permission. The headhunter reminds the initiate of the DGL Starter Pack recommended actions, and welcomes the new initiate publicly in Classic with the following message:
“DGL Bros, please join me in welcoming [Name] [@WhatsApp Tag]!”
e.g.
“DGL Bros, please join me in welcoming David G Miami [888-674-2342]!”
🕊️ DGL headhunters may be asked to do a three-way call for their first intake call with an admin’s supervision and support to help guide them and mentor them on any difficulties they may have.
Moderators provide the essential function of keeping DGL Channels in line with our group policies and values and allow this community to thrive as the sacred space it is.
(for Classic) moderating DGL classic posting, moving posts to Freestyle or deleting when necessary.
(for other channels) moderating special interest channels, as per their guidelines
Writing a monthly service reflection check-in in “DGL Service”
Moderator is considered a light level of commitment, as thanks to our DGL culture, most channels are well-versed and habituated with the guidelines of DGL posting and require minimal upkeep. It’s important when acting as a moderator to maintain a demeanor of neutrality and courtesy. Remember! Think about the group spirit, and use that as your guide. There may be something you dislike or disagree with, but as long as it abides the group principles as stated in the charter, it is critical that all voices be heard.
Example Prayer for Mods
“Dear [Higher Power], please help me act as a moderator in ways that are in line with your will for me and the principles of my community. Please help me let go of my selfishness and be of service in a way that puts principles before personalities. Please help me moderate in ways that are kind, forgiving and clear, and to encourage a culture of openness and forgiveness. Amen. ”
Similar to NYC Augustine or other 12 step programs, Hosts’ duties are to host and facilitate meetings on zoom.
Hosting a weekly 1hr zoom meeting, as per the meeting schedule and script
Writing a monthly service reflection check-in in “DGL Service”
Host are considered a “heavy” level of commitment because they are inflexible, on a fixed schedule and require 1 hour of uninterrupted time per week where the Host will be holding space for the group.
(07/06/2025) — Admin(s) are currently in the process of organizing weekly men’s meetings for supplemental work to SLAA recovery. Meetings designated as [12S] will function as 12-step groups with their own group conscious. All DGL Bros meetings are open to qualifying participants and membership in DGL Bros is not mandatory to attend. Some topics we are considering for different days of the week are: DGL Bros Gratitude Speaker , Gentle Path Study Group, The Body Keeps the Score Study Group, [12S] ACA Big Book Study Group, [12S] ACA Inner Loving Parent Guidebook Study Group, [12S] Incest Survivors Anonymous. As of now, we do not have any meeting scheduled but intend to begin our first weekly meeting of one of the aforementioned groups in July 2025 with our volunteer hosts. Admin(s) will be developing group scripts and publishing meeting links. More on this soon!
As DGL Bros transitions into self-sustaining service, additional service positions and their roles will be further fleshed out.
